Listening skills and non verbal behaviour
Talking is not the only factor that is important in communication between people. How one acts and listens is also very important as it can affect the state of a conversation in a good or bad way. Just earlier this week I saw an exchange between two people that emphasizes how non-verbal skills are a key factor in communication. While going home I witness two parents trying to talk to their child. The mother was trying to ask him about his grades but while she was talking the boy was using his phone and giving one word responses like 'ya' or 'yes' , which probably indicates that he was paying attention to what she is saying . I can see that the mother was visibly annoyed and was trying to garner a more healthy response from her child. However he was obviously more occupied with his phone and is showing bad body language as he was facing away from the person trying to speak to him. The father on the other hand was also minding his own business and not adding anything to the conversation. This also likely added to the frustration of the mother as ultimately the conversation was abruptly ended with the mother saying that she will continue the discussion at a later time.
Age can play a factor in how one would communicate , as a huge gap in age would result in different upbringing for both parties.This would likely cause a variation in culture as they were surrounded by different people and also were taught different things. For instance my parents were brought up in Malaysia while I moved to Singapore at the age of 2, so the way they show that they care differs from what I might feel as how one would care for others, and sometimes this can lead to misunderstandings. Gender can also play a part in a conversation as people would be more comfortable when speaking to another of the same gender, as even up to now , men and women do not fully understand each other, however in this case where it is a mother and child, I feel that gender is not a huge factor in the conversation , as most children are comfortable with speaking to their mother.
To conclude an age gap would likely cause a difference in culture and this may result in different interpretation of the actions or words in a communication, trying to understand and also maybe attempt to open up to the opposing party while in a conversation may help to soothe things up
Edited
Hi Wei Ern,
ReplyDeleteI will agree that it is much easier to give a one word response to our parents due to the age gap. However, it is a form of respect when we are able to respond with a more appropriate and properly structured answer. Although it may not be easy to resolve such an issue, it always start with practice and we have to be willing to change first of all.
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ReplyDeleteGreetings Wei Ern,
ReplyDeleteIn general, you have a clear content for the nonverbal behavior part and it would be better if you explained a bit more on listening skills. Also, I agree that one should display proper body language during a conversation, such as facing the speaker. However, I disagree to the part where you mention that age gap causes one to gives one word replies. I believe that as long as the listener is unintetested on the conversation, he or she will react is such manner.
Hello Wei Ern, it's clear from your example on how poor non verbal skills are able to affect communication between people. By having weak active listening skills, we tend to not fully hear and understand what people are saying. Due to this, we tend to give them one worded replies to show as if we were listening to what they said. Instead, this will show that we did not listen to what they said and this may annoy them further.
ReplyDeleteAbout the age being a factor in affecting the communication between the son and the mother, I tend to disagree that it affects communication. Even if the mother was of any age, this should not change the way the son should have responded.